


You’re Not In Between, Nezu-Chan

by TheDormantYankofPeace



Category: Danger Mouse (Cartoon 2015)
Genre: AnthroFurries, Comedy, Cross World Media, Human, Humor, Observations, Oneshot, Other, Preferences, Randomness, Self-Insert, Shame, Vulgar Sketches, difficult, experiences
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-04
Updated: 2020-09-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:34:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26288071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDormantYankofPeace/pseuds/TheDormantYankofPeace
Summary: This is just a random daydream in my head without an origin point as to how my real human self fit into the DM reboot’s anthrofurry ruled world. The Author’s Notes at the beginning and end of this Oneshot will explain things better.
Relationships: Danger Mouse/Self Inserted OC
Kudos: 1





	You’re Not In Between, Nezu-Chan

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I apologize if this random puzzling plot bunny from my head is just a taste of one of my unwritten daydreams. So I’ll be brief on the details: My human identity is in DM’s reboot world; Prof. Squawkencluck took an immediate fascination in my existence among the anthropomorphic animal society; and I wrote this bit to try and simmer down any displeasure I’d been feeling towards a few episodes of The Armstrong And Miller Series that may not have resonated with my Soul Wavelength on November 14th, 2017.

** You’re Not In Between, Nezu-Chan **

**“COLONEL BASTARD K!!!”** An angry woman’s voice rang loudly throughout the Danger Flat. **“YOU REMEMBER PENFOLD’S NAME THIS INSTANT LIKE YOU USED TO...OR ELSE I’LL USE THE SHRINKATIZER TO ENLARGE THE SERIOUSIZER AS BIG AS THE EARTH, AND ZAP EVERY SORRY LOT IN YOUR IDIOCRACY WORLD!!!”**

Danger Mouse huddled himself behind the couch, shaking with fear while Professor Squawkencluck giggled at the moody new flat guest from an alternative universe. “I really like her,” she mused smugly.

DM cringed. “I don’t know what you see in that other worldly human, Prof. We didn’t even make any toilet or arse jokes recently. So what set her off this time!?”

The chicken boffin placed a feathered finger over her beak, beaming at the cowering agent as he peeked his head over the sofa. “That’s for me to know, Danger Mouse, and for you to find out. FYI, it’s all your fault.”

“Me!?” He exclaimed incrediously. “What did _I_ do to her!?”

“Well, technically, _you_ didn’t cause Wendela to feel stressed. It’s those human Spamchops video apps on her phone which she’d been looking through again. And apparently, the British male human who does your new voice back in her universe performed an earlier comedy series, where some of his sketches didn’t seem to appeal much to her fancy.”

DM gulped. “Is she scarred for life that badly...?”

Squawkencluck smirked playfully. “Well, I can’t tell you out loud because this is a kid’s show. So lend me your ear.”

...

“AAAUUUGGGHHH!!!!” DM yelled before clamping his snout and mouth in horror. The sins that the Professor had whispered in his ear were perverted and beyond the PG-13 rating. “Oh~~, Dear. Poor Wendela,” he squeaked. “She may never ever want to hear me speak again!!”

“Your knickers are in a twist, Mouse,” Squawkencluck sighed heavily. “Her curiosity led her to feel conflicted with her innocence and bad ass personality while trying to understand the reality of her world’s sense of humor. Wendela once told me that she really looked up to the Old You while my Granddad, Professor Heinrich Von Squawkencluck worked in the Agency. But the changes of our world after 23 years of your hibernation had unfortunately, let her down. And she became wary of the villains and characters she used to know.”

DM stared sadly to the side. “I’m happy that she doesn’t hate me, Prof. But sometimes I can’t seem to figure her out. When she first crossed over to our world and met me, she took a liking to my personality and called me her first ‘British Anime Boy’. But when I told her adventures about my previous missions which involved breaking wind noises and toilets, she gave me this offended glare and walked away. One minute she basks in my immature boyish nature, the next she turns into a cross, prudish girl again. I wonder what happened to her as a child that caused her to feel uncomfortable to gas jokes and the nether regions of her world’s humans.”

Squawkencluck suddenly snickered as her eyes lit up. “Ha! Wendela was right! One _would_ start to wonder how Princess Dawn can tolerate being near Dr. Loocifer. Little girls always like to stay pretty and clean.”

“Not focusing on me, Squawk,” pouted DM irritably. “Is there anything I could do for her to take her mind off those shocking videos?”

“Just give her some time to cool off, Danger Mouse,” The Professor advised him confidently. “That human Spamchops app from her world is called...’Youtube’, I think. And she’s really fancying 22 old short clips of the Old You’s cartoon series which she found recently. You must have really meant something to her. I’ve never seen her enjoy the ‘Bedside Frog’ clip of ‘Secret Agent Secrets’ so much. I bet my Granddad would have been pleased to meet Wendela if he were still with us.”

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Danger Mouse tried not to vomit in the HoloDeck as he witnessed Wendela shooting Rated R graphic 3D images of human zombies covered in blood and rotting flesh. Professor Squawkencluck must have observed enough of Wendela’s human culture through her world’s Apple phone to create a video game, which suited to her taste in Awesomeness.

“If you can’t handle my love for a fan comic of you called ‘Chiller’,” she mused teasingly. “Don’t enter my therapy session.” She then turned her head back towards her targets and resumed shooting their heads off.

“Urgh! Good Grief, Wendela!” DM cried in disbelief. “You are impossible to understand!!”

“What do you want, you Yank converted Brit?” She snarked moodily as she continued to fire away.

DM grimaced at her latest rude remark towards him. “You _really_ don’t like breaking wind noises, do you.”

“I’m still not speaking to you, you turncoat of Gentlemen.”

“Now look here, Wendela,” he stated more firmly. “You’re not being very fair to me.” The unhappy mouse failed to sense another NPC zombie sneaking up behind him until he turned around, cutting his lecture short.

“I understand that I haven’t exactly entered your sweet spot of American and Japanese humor as early as your fondness for those Ninja Turtles and anime cartoons. But you must realize that you’re lacking a bit of tolerance for adult entertainment-AAUUGGHH!! END PROGRAM!! END PROGRAM!!!”

The HoloDeck immediately reverted back to the normal layout of the room, eradicating the Post Apocalyptic red, fiery sky and burned out dirt and shrubs from the video game.

“Hey!” The 29 year old brunette complained crossly. “I was enjoying this exercise, you Baka Mausu!!” Then she grimaced with disgust as a traumatized DM lost his lunch on the HoloDeck platform.

“I’m not cleaning that off the floor,” she protested defiantly. “And Squawkencluck would tell you to clean your glob lookin goo up too.”

**Author's Note:**

> Tracking down the other career works of American anime voice actors never scarred me for life before I met the New DM. This curious cat had observed more than she could tolerate from that 2 decade series of The Armstrong and Miller Show. I thought I’d forget about them until I had a dirty dream last night. Because my Aspergered brain has been trained to be easily stimulated by the voices of my favorite cartoon characters, listening to Pointless on my iPad while playing DG on my iPhone can still trigger an M rated dream about DM with Elephant Flu.
> 
> FYI with an implied spoiler alert: the old DM didn’t mind saying that Feline title in an old 80’s episode of his cartoon series.
> 
> Lastly, I want to give a big shout out and Thank you to AshleyWolf259, for making Nezu-chan more cool in his fan art and comic series. Writing this during my unnerving confusion from watching that unexpected comedy show really helped me calm down.
> 
> Description Update 4/7/20: Correction: there’s a whole other community out there that has NSFW sketches exactly like The Armstrong and Miller Show. FurAffinity may have cleared up new areas of my ignorance, but it didn’t smear my innocence.


End file.
